


the universal law of gravitation

by starlightwalking



Series: Modern Middle-earth [6]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: AroAce Zine, Aromantic Asexual Fili, Aromantic Fíli, Asexual Fili, Astronauts, Character Study, Gen, Modern Middle Earth, space travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-05 21:18:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17332544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starlightwalking/pseuds/starlightwalking
Summary: Fíli floats alone in space, contemplating the void.





	the universal law of gravitation

**Author's Note:**

> This was my submission to the Aro Ace Zine: Everyone Needs Some Space. Thanks to the organizers for putting together such a wonderful project!! :)  
> This story is canonical to my Modern Middle-earth series (which you should totally check out!) but aside from "it's Middle-earth, but modern" you don't need to have any further context than "Fili is an astronaut." The reason for why and how that fits into the canon I've established can be found in the other Fili-centric fic I wrote in this universe, [Gravity](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14068392).

There's something about floating in the darkness of space that makes Fíli feel like he has a purpose.

Not that he doesn't have one down planetside. He's still a prince, a son, a brother, a friend. But up here, surrounded by nothing, the empty places inside him don't feel like flaws. They feel like passageways for starlight and space dust to pass through his soul.

He belongs up here. Here, where everything is a vacuum and things that make him feel broken aren't faults, but blessings. How can he be missing something when absence is holy, up here in the endless nothing?

Fíli is tied with innumerable bonds to countless people, places, things. His sojourn in space is temporary; he could never leave Middle-earth entirely. He belongs to his family, to Erebor, to his people. He is quite literally attached by a cord anchoring him to the ship, lest he be lost and drifting until he perishes all alone.

He understands the beauty of solid ground. He knows why most folks never even desire to leave it. He is a dwarf, a creature of stone and fire, and something about leaving the restraints of the atmosphere he was birthed in is terrifying. But sometimes he wonders if he has not become a little bit elvish, his soul flitting between the earth and sky, drawn to the ethereal and the unseen.

But then again, is it not dwarven to delve deep, to discover the hidden treasures of the universe? Fíli has done what his ancestors did not: crossed over into the æther, mining stardust and moonstones.

Perhaps this is what his brother had seen in that elfmaid of his. Their love had always been star-crossed, fated, doomed. They whispered starlit promises, made vows under the open sky, bathed in the moonlight. But for all their love of the night and its beauties, they are bound to the earth, and here he floats peacefully among the stars.

Fíli's home is deep beneath a mountain, where a dragon once lay on mounds of gold and where his people now thrive. But there amongst the solid reminders of life and death, there is always an aspect of being that he somehow lacks. He lived in a world apart from those who breathed alongside him, absent from the desires that seemed otherwise universal.

But attraction, romantic and otherwise, simply does not exist here. He feels his soul open up, communing with the universe.

Everything exerts a pull on everything else. Elven scholars have a name for it: the universal law of gravitation. He understands the concept mathematically; he has to, to have gotten this far. The metaphysical aspect is beyond him, but he feels it all the same. He is connected to every living thing equally—no special, unknowable feeling required.

And so Fíli floats alone in space, contemplative. Soon enough he will signal to his crew to pull him back into the ship; soon enough that ship will descend down to the surface of Middle-earth and he will reunite with those who love him.

But that is not now. Now, he has time to think. Now, he is free to find himself and answer all the questions that he has never yet been asked. Now, he is free to lose himself in this lovely void, to surrender his spirit to the stillness of the nothing all around him.

Now, he has the space he needs.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr [@arofili](http://arofili.tumblr.com/).  
> Thanks for reading and commenting!


End file.
